What's with the TWITTER HYPE?

What the hell is this Twitter thing? I see and hear that word all this time. It's being repeated on my MTV, by celebrities, on my fave blogs and even on my mom's BNN news channel! It seems like this thing is everywhere. Just what IS this bird-related virus that's circulating?



Twitter's official website claims-
'Twitter is without a doubt the best way to share and discover what is happening right now.'

Yeah, I'd bet. WITHOUT a doubt, that's a bit full of yourself isn't it? What am I supposed to discover anyways?





Wikipedia says-
'Twitter is a free social networking and micro-blogging service that enables its users to send and read messages known as tweets. Tweets are text-based posts of up to 140 characters displayed on the author's profile page and delivered to the author's subscribers who are known as followers. '

Annnnnd the bird puns just never stop. I get it, I get it, you are a bird like many other users. You are social and tweet/talk to your fellow...chicks? Hell, I don't know. And you can decide to 'follow' those who are interesting to you or perhaps, higher up on the aerial food chain than you.
That's all cutesy and fine and certainly clever of them, but I've always had an irrational hatred of birds.
What a coincidence that they pick the one thing I'm deathly afraid of! I hate birds, they're loud, annoying and always chattering. They never shut the hell up and they're effing EVERYWHERE. They're not adorable, they're getting on my last nerves.
What's the phobia called again? Ornithophobia? More like TwitterPhobia.




Blippr raves-
'Twitter is a service for friends, family, and co-workers to communicate and stay connected through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simp.'

Simp.? The hell is that? I think it was cut off but I couldn't find the end to the sentence. Ohhhh my life will never be complete! I don't think I can sleep tonite.
'... to communicate and stay connected..' Isn't that what facebook is for? I put off getting one at first until months later when it was practically a necessity to SURVIVE I finally buckled down and registered. I don't want to yet another site-of-the-moment when facebook is already close to perfection.
As for the tweets, use the status update you noob! Same concept, more characters available.
(More than) two services for the price of one social networking website. Thank me later.

Following celebrities-
Ooh look! A more effective way to stalk my favorite celebs without the use of a US weekly magazine, binoculars or a tracking device! Sooooooo convenient and I can find out what they're doing every minute of the hour of the day! It's nooot creepy, I'm just curious!
Hahah. Seriously though. They'd better watch it. A fan could find out the location of where they're staying, see a tweet that they're heading out for a movie or a restaurant and can ambush them. But no one's that crazy *shift*
Onto another topic (I'm just rambling at this point), celebs are famous. Looked up to. They'd better watch out what they type or they'd find themselves without a whoooole lotta fans and in a pile of shit.



Getting news-
Nowadays we get our best news from twitter first.
Paula leaving American Idol?! 'With sadness in my heart, I've decided not to return to Idol.'
Tila is pregnant?! 'Before I bounce, and since it’s late, I’m gonna tell ya’ll something REAL FAST and then delete it, OK? Since nobody is awake…the reason why I’ve been feeling sick on and off lately is because yes, I am pregnant! *GASPS…ok, bye.'

Very juicy and extremely convenient indeed! But why the hell are they exposing the truth for free over a bird-based website? They could have sold that story to the papers for a good amount of money for a full coverage. I'm thinking of them here! Who doesn't want more moolah/publicity? Like Perez says 'you're only as hot as your latest scandal'

Better updates?-
Once upon a time, there was a successful blogger named Wendy. She could write decently, photoshop fantastically and was interesting to read. Then came along Twitter.
Updates on her blog stopped almost immediately, lacking content except for paid ads. For glamorous photos, she had a little photoblog to post in and all the lovely pics ceased. Anything worth interest was tweeted out to her followers- while still fun to read, it could have made a smashing blog entry instead. Slowly her blog died as readers lost their enthusiasm and decided to bookmark her twitter instead. And that's the story of a girl named Wendy.
Part of it anyways. 3 and a half cookies to whoever can imagine who I'm talking about.


Conclusion-
Well anyways, I predict that in 6 months from now, the site Twitter would have lost all hype and joined it's friend Nexopia in the networking graveyard. How the hell would I know? Let's just say a little birdy told me.